spiritual life.

[stein]

hey is anyone familiar with the fact that psychoses can also be a form of spiritual life?

[noxot]

I can't really tell if psychosis can be spiritual. part of what people would call my psychosis does seem helpful sometimes. and I feel happy sometimes with the way I am (when I don't feel sad or feel like evil spirits are messing with me) I doubt I would have the mindset that I have if I did not have this mental problem. and I sort of enjoy having it in a way because how could I ever relate to anyone else with similar problems when I have not been through some of those things? just like paul said "to the jews I became a jew..." and ect.

but i really don't know if I will make it out of this alive. sometimes all I want is for all of me to end (sometimes I want God to delete me). for there to be no more struggle. and no more hurting others by my choices.

in what ways has your psychosis had positive effects on you?

I put more thought into this post but this is what I originally said:

I can't really tell if psychosis can be spiritual. part of what people would call my psychosis does seem helpful sometimes. I doubt I would have the mindset that I have if I did not have what is wrong with me. but i think that there has got to be some kind of great advantage to all of this.

[stein]

hey noxot.

for sure don't ever give up or even think of it. make it your own law.
i know from experience i have learned a huge amount throughout the past 8 years, that's since i got psychotic.

i like what you say about paul. (i did think he already was a jew though am not sure)
but i get your point.

my psychosis have had the positive effect that i appreciate life and believe life actually has more to offer and has a deeper meaning. and i found believe in god and christ now. not to forget the holy ghost/spirit.

ps if you feel bad you can pm or email me or just post it here. i'd appreciate that...

[noxot]

haha brother you noticed that paul was already a jew. that is good. let me tell you a secret. paul did not start to exist when he was born on this earth. this is how paul I think can say "I became a jew for the jews". Jesus says to some people in the gospel "you came from below but I come from above" now I think that also hints at a mystery. also i know that Gods word teaches like a vast river flowing and so the Spirit of God will direct us all to see as much as we can see!

i think that God has shown me that we did not start existing when were were born on the earth but we have been existing for who knows how long. this is also part of the reason that i believe that hell is not an eternal torment or a deletion but rather just another stage of things in which God is constantly working for our good in His Love to make us all better even though many things He does are hard to understand.

[stein]

i red it with pleasure noiw it's basics the first part of your post but not all is

[noxot]

I am sorry, really I am not worthy to try to explain such things. really i know that God can show you those things in any way He wants to.

I have to try and escape from myself and to find myself you know...

I know I lack so much brother. really I just want to share things I think Christ gave me but I don't want to fall into some kind of trap of my ego or some other kind of trap.

can i pray about anything for you? I do not get prayer but I know it is good. do you pray a lot? if you are kind of feeling alone then maybe you could go to christianforums.com if you think good will come of it? I don't really understand what you are going through but I just want good for you. really prayer is very good. the more the better it seems. really God listens and speaks.

[stein]

thank you

salut

btw prayer can be always in many forms if you wish so.

[noxot]

yes. i see God is with you.

[stein]

i red what you said again but i doubt between hard and good in there.
i hear you.

you speak really good huh? tell me who i am and what all the deals are that are so.
but whos in lead, i dont mean here, or so. but in general.

where we going?
heading of too?

i be ok and i be happy so with it.
and when not its good to know god and people are good i hope too.

did you get more then half?

we live, right heay?

i tell you, you tell me. i see it as if the basics been set. i dunno you tell me later ok i also look a lot but dont really do lots or to much with it.

now i do. ok.

but what am i to say.

hey

[noxot]

Mar 17, 2012 17:25:44 GMT stein said:

i red what you said again but i doubt between hard and good in there.
i hear you.

you speak really good huh? tell me who i am and what all the deals are that are so.
but whos in lead, i dont mean here, or so. but in general.

where we going?
heading of too?

i be ok and i be happy so with it.
and when not its good to know god and people are good i hope too.

did you get more then half?

we live, right heay?

i tell you, you tell me. i see it as if the basics been set. i dunno you tell me later ok i also look a lot but dont really do lots or to much with it.

now i do. ok.

but what am i to say.

hey

I really don't know or understand you this time. I just don't have answers, how could i know? Christ knows. i'm sorry that i can't speak dutch or another language that you know, would like to communicate better with you. trust me it would be worse off if I tried to speak dutch. I know like, 1 word in dutch lol.

or if i can see your mind, if there are a lot of different thoughts at once coming? I don't know. how is your mind? it is hard to describe my mind and how it is. or i can give an example of how some peoples minds might be a little bit. but some parts of me say this video is dangerous but I don't know if it is. some videos drive me more crazy kind of. i doubt someones mind is exactly like this but would suck I think if all that was there at once. I don't get what they are trying to do but it is something.